Last Years in America

While I was in this district, I had intelligence of my only surviving brother, and took a further journey of three hundred miles to Utica, to see him; I found him there, married and comfortably settled in life. I had not seen him since his departure from our parental roof; at which time I was a child of six years of age. It was an affectingly joyful meeting to us both; and my gratitude to the Lord was heightened by finding in him a fellow-traveller to the kingdom of heaven, and a member of the Baptist church in Utica. I there met with Mrs. Jones, a female preacher, who had come from England, where it appeared her ministry had been popular, though it was otherwise with her in America. Being myself a member of the parent stock, or the old Methodist Society, I possessed an advantage over many other labourers, in having access to many pulpits which they had not. The dear brethren in Utica freely opened their chapels to me; and we enjoyed many very blessed opportunities of edification to our souls. In one of their large chapels in which I preached, a number of young men conspired together, and came to hear me, with their hands filled with stones; intending, if I uttered any sentiments which they disapproved of, to pelt me therewith: my brother had driven me to the place in a carriage and pair; the chapel was amazingly crowded, the presence of the Lord overshadowed the assembly, and the worship suffered no interruption from the young gentlemen, who came, not to be instructed in the way of truth, but to sit in judgment on and try my discourse by the standard of their petty opinions. After service, my brother went to fetch the horses from some stables adjacent, these tyros were standing there; and he overheard their conversation, discovered their wicked plot and heard them confess that they knew not what ailed them when they entered the chapel; but their arms seemed bound and held down, and were so paralized that they dropped the stones upon the floor, and that their emotions were such during the service as they had never felt before. Having spent a very happy week with my brother, I was compelled to hasten back to New York to fulfil my engagement with the brethren there. On going to the water side to take my passage in the two o’clock steamer, the captain informed me that he had no room for another passenger; though my complexion appeared to be the chief reason of his refusal. I was therefore in a strait, for the performance of my engagement with the brethren in New York depended on my going that day; however, I learnt that there was another steamer about to start at seven in the evening; and on my application, the captain thereof agreed to take me with him. I therefore thanked God and took courage. We had a very pleasant passage, and many of the persons on board belonged to the household of faith; and what with edifying conversation, and the relation of each other’s experience, we enjoyed a little Bethel. On the deck in the morning, I noticed several of the gentlemen engaged in very earnest conversation, and perceived that their discourse had reference to me; I therefore withdrew into the cabin, and had been there but a few minutes when one of them came and requested me to preach them a sermon on board. I replied that I felt no desire to preach by the will of man, and to gratify a human curiosity; he then assured me that the gentlemen who concurred in this request, were persons of integrity, whose aim was not novelty and curiosity, but edification. I then objected that the captain might not approve of such an attempt; he said he would ask permission of the captain and withdrew. The captain’s consent being obtained, the crew came, and seated themselves in the cabin to the number of sixty. I then read a hymn, prayed, delivered a short address, concluded the service and took my seat. In a short time, I again perceived them in close conversation, and apparently talking about me, and I therefore withdrew; the same gentleman presently called me back, and said, “these gentlemen are greatly gratified by your discourse, and desire your acceptance of your passage money”; upon which he presented me with a sum which more than covered the expense of my passage. I was therefore astonished at the fresh display of the kind providence of my indulgent God; for I was then much straitened in pecuniary matters, and was three hundred miles distant from New York; they then informed me that five of their number were ministers of the gospel, and I saw how remarkably God had overruled matters to prevent my passage in the earliest vessel, to introduce me to so many Christian friends, and arrange for me so convenient a supply of money for my necessities. I arrived in New York safely; and after fulfilling my engagements with the brethren proceeded home to Nantucket, where we found all things well, and the brethren rejoiced at and welcomed our return. We arrived at home on a Saturday, having been a week on our journey from New York, at a very critical point of time. In the evening after our arrival, our dear minister, Mr. Pierce, called to see us, and requested my assistance on the approaching Lord’s day. I therefore resumed my former labours in the congregations. On Tuesday, December 10, 1834, my daughter was safely delivered of her first-born son, and the blessing of the Lord very apparently rested upon the family. Soon after this, our Baptist brethren being destitute of a minister, and the coloured people of that denomination having a chapel on the island, requested me to preach statedly to them; which, with the consent of Mr. Pierce, I did, and the Lord wrought marvellously among them; the holy fire was greatly diffused throughout the town; many of the coloured people were turned to the Lord, and I had the pleasure of seeing them at the sea-side immersed into Christ, they putting on the Lord Jesus in the ordinance of believing baptism. Our methodist class-meetings also were powerfully attended with the presence and operations of the Holy Spirit; and indeed a wonderful revival of the work of the Lord ensued, which extended to every part of the town, and to every denomination of Christians. On the meeting of the conference, our dear minister, Mr. Pierce, was removed from the island, and the Rev. J. Lovejoy was stationed there in his stead. He manifested himself a faithful minister of the cross of Jesus, and I enjoyed with him the same intimate friendship and unity of faith, of purpose and effort as with Mr. Pierce. My daughter was some time afterwards attacked by a very serious illness, which continued upon her for a long time without any prospect of amendment; but one day, our minister called to see her, and prayed most fervently with her, and during prayer, the Lord vouchsafed a surprising manifestation to her soul, and from that very hour both she and the infant began to recover.

Having laboured for some time at home with very great success, my mind again began to be impressed with the weight of more distant spheres of labour, and my impressions seemed directed to the States of New Hampshire and Vermont. About this time it happened that I was from home a few weeks on a visit; and as I was sitting in the house of God, I was caught up in spirit, away from and far above all sublunary things; and appeared to be standing on a very elevated place in the midst of tens of thousands, who were all seated around, clothed in white; my own complexion and raiment were also white, and I was employed in addressing this immense concourse: it was such a scene as had never before entered into my conceptions; and presently it disappeared, and I found myself again in the chapel. I pondered this wonderful vision over in my mind, and concluded that it was given to me as a token that the Lord had destined me for enlarged and more elevated spheres of effort; and the Christian friends to whom I related it, also thought it a prelude to my future ministerial work. After this, I returned home, and in a few weeks afterwards, the same vision, but much nearer and more vivid than before, was presented before me in the chapel, as I was sitting under a sermon; and after a short interval it was presented to me a third time in the class meeting; but more vividly still. I related these visions to Mr. Lovejoy’s mother, who concurred in my interpretation of them; adding that she thought it was my duty to go out again on an itinerating ministry: some time after this, the sisters of our society presented me with a quantity of apparel, with some money, which they had secretly prepared and subscribed; bidding me to go in the name of the Lord, and call sinners to repentance. Thus again was that Scripture verified to me, “Seek ye the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added unto you.”

I left home again in July, 1835; and was absent fifteen months: the Lord graciously prepared the minds of the people everywhere for my ministry; and many received the word with gladness and singleness of heart. I was in Boston when Mr. George Thompson was lecturing there on the abominations of slavery; great crowds were attracted to his lectures, and much light was diffused by his zealous exertions in the cause of emancipation. From Boston I went to Lynn to attend the Conference. I was there introduced to Bishop Hedding, and spent an afternoon in his company. He requested a sight of my testimonials and letters of recommendation, which I handed him; and he expressed his entire satisfaction with them, but inquired if it should be found that my ministry was calculated to excite contention, many persons being strongly averse to the ministry of females, whether I would be willing to relinquish it. To which, I replied, that no ambition of mine, but the special appointment of God, had put me into the ministry; and, therefore, I had no option in the matter; and as to such Christians as take up ignorant and prejudiced objections against my labours; men whose whims are law, who walk after the imagination of their own hearts, and to whom the cause of God is a toy; I could not for a moment study their gratification at the sacrifice of duty. It is an easy matter to adopt a string of notions on religion, and make a great ado about them; but the weight of religious obligation, and the principle of conscientious obedience to God are quite another matter. I enjoyed the good bishop’s company, and heard him with pleasure avow that he should be sorry in any way to discourage me.

From Lynn I itinerated from city to city, and from village to village, preaching the gospel of the kingdom in the fear of the Lord; and great was the number of those who believed and were baptised.

On my visit to Flushing, I preached from Isaiah xxxviii. 1, “Set thine house in order; for thou shalt die and not live.” Under that sermon many persons were awakened, and among the number was one poor woman who cried to the Lord for mercy, and applied for admission into the church; but her application was rejected, because she was then cohabiting with a man by whom she had borne five children, yet had neglected to comply with the matrimonial form required by the law of the state. Whether her position was that of mere concubinage or marriage de facto; and whether the brethren were in their decision equally justified by Scripture as by the law of the state and the sense of society, are points which may admit of much discussion: the marriage customs and laws set forth by God in the Scriptures, are so widely opposite from those of civilized nations in modern times, that when such cases arise, and the sacred and secular authorities clash upon them, it is not easy to determine what course ought to be pursued by a Christian communion. Happily, however, these parties immediately complied with the requirement of the American marriage law, the usage of society, and the dictum of the church; upon which they were admitted into the Methodist connexion, lived happily in the Lord, and became respected as good members of society.

On leaving Flushing, I took a long and circuitous route, and after an absence of fifteen months, returned home with great peace of mind.

I remained at home this time for the space of three years, with the exception of an occasional short journey, and visit of a few weeks; and throughout this period, my mind was often burdened with the weight of a voyage to England. I often argued the matter before the Lord in prayer, pleading my ignorance, my sex, my colour and my inability to minister the gospel in a country so polished and enlightened, so furnished with Bibles, so blessed with ministers, so studded with temples; but the Lord said, “say not, I cannot speak; for thou shalt go to all to whom I send thee, and what I command thee, thou shalt speak.”

In 1837, when on a visit to some religious friends, one morning, I saw a remarkable vision; I appeared to be in a strange place, and conversing with a stranger, when three enormous balls of fire came perpendicularly over my head, and each of them exploded and burst at the same moment: I instantly appeared to fall to the ground; but was caught up by an unseen hand, and placed upon an animal, which darted with me through the regions of the air, with the velocity of lightning, and deposited me inside the window of an upper chamber. I there heard the voice of the Almighty, saying, “I have a message for her to go with upon the high seas, and she will go.” This occurrence took place just three years prior to my departure from America.

In 1839, the Lord was pleased to send me again into the Southern states; and as I travelled from city to city, I felt the impression that the time was near when I must leave the land of my nativity for a foreign shore. In the town of Providence, Rhode Island, I preached on a Thursday evening in a large Room, for Mr. Bedell. On the following Lord’s-day, I attended the Wesleyan Chapel, where I heard Mr. Bedell in the morning, and, by his invitation, occupied his pulpit in the afternoon, on which occasion the chapel proved much too small for the crowds which assembled: after the service, some leading gentlemen from another denomination came to Mr. Bedell, and offered him the use of their chapel, which was much larger than his, for the evening service. It was thankfully accepted, and I preached there in the evening, to an immense audience. Mr. Bedell and his lady were both of them natives of England; at that time he was stationed in the Providence circuit. I had not been in their company a quarter of an hour when both of them avowed their concurrent impression, that I was destined by the Lord to minister the gospel in a foreign land: such an observation appeared to me very remarkable. From Providence I visited New York, Philadelphia and Baltimore; and wherever I went, the inquiry was continually made, if I was not about shortly to embark for England, accompanied by observations that my ministry was ultimately destined for a different arena than was furnished by America. I went on to the city of Washington, and our meetings there were greatly distinguished by the presence and operations of the Holy Spirit. Lady Hunter, of whom mention is made in my former visit to that city thirteen years before, presented me with a contribution in aid of this purpose; and I could not but remark, how the Lord everywhere moved the minds of my friends to make it a topic of conversation; thereby keeping it always before me, and increasing the stimulus of my mind towards it; and without any solicitation of mine, they presented me their cheerful contributions; yea, both white and coloured brethren, voluntarily came forward with their free-will offerings, to enable me to undertake the voyage, and bade me go and preach to strangers in a strange land, in the name of the Lord. Many were the proofs besides those related in this work, that the Lord gave me, of His purpose that I should come to England; and being now many hundreds of miles distant from my daughter, and feeling that the Lord’s time had arrived, I wrote to apprise her thereof, and shortly after returned homewards as far as New York, where I attended the anniversary of the abolition society: many of the speakers on that occasion came over to England to attend the great anti-slavery meeting in Exeter Hall. I then returned home; and was very affectionately received by my dear daughter; and made all possible dispatch in preparations for my departure.

The parting moment was painful in the extreme; for my daughter, and her two dear little boys, were entwined in the strongest affections of my heart; but I durst not disobey Him who had said unto me, as he had said unto Abraham, “Get thee out from thy country, and from thy kindred, and from thy father’s house, unto a land that I will show thee.” On the 10th of June 1840, I rose from the bed on which I had laid for the last time; the recollection of that bitter morning even now suffuses my eyes with tears, and interrupts the delineations of my pen: the morning was calm, our minds resigned and peaceful, and we took, and held each others hand, in silence; which was at length broken by my daughter, who said, “Mother, we part now, but I think we shall yet meet again; the will of the Lord be done, and God be with thee.” At nine o’clock, A. M., I bade farewell to those dear ties, and started for New York, where I tarried until the 1st July; and then I took the steam-boat to go to the ship Philadelphia, Captain Morgan, which vessel was lying in quarantine. Soon after our arrival on board, she got under weigh, and set sail for the port of London. My feelings on leaving the land of my nativity, and all that was dear to me on earth, were acutely indescribable; but God commanded, and I obeyed; bidding farewell to my country, and, committing my dear friends to the grace of God. The wind was fair, the passengers agreeable, and we were soon carried beyond the view of land. On the following morning, I awoke and presented my thanksgivings to my heavenly Father for His preserving care of me throughout the night. I then went upon deck, and surveyed the broad canopy above, and the rolling ocean beneath, gently moving wave after wave, as we glided over its tremulous surface. I observed the birds of the air flying over our heads, and wondered, at such a distance from land, that they were able to take such excursions without resting. I beheld the finny tribes pouring forth by thousands. I was now floating on the great and wide sea, wherein are things creeping innumerable, both small and great beasts. There go the ships! there is that great leviathan whom thou hast made to play therein. These wait all upon thee, that thou mayest give them their meat in due season. Oh Lord, how manifold are thy works! in wisdom hast thou made them all! the earth is full of thy riches. Psalm civ. 24, 27.