Nurturing the Next Generation: Raising Godly Children

"And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart: and thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up." Deuteronomy 6:6-7 (KJV) There is no greater mission field on earth than your own home. The children God has placed in your care are the next generation of the Church, the next leaders of your village, your town, your nation. How they are raised will determine whether the gospel advances or retreats in East Africa in the years to come. And under God, no one has more influence on a child in the early years than the mother.

In the Old Testament, God gave clear instructions to parents. The Shema, in Deuteronomy chapter six, tells parents to teach the commandments of God to their children diligently. The word "diligently" is important. It is not casual teaching, not something done only on Sunday mornings, but constant, ongoing, woven into every moment of life. As you walk, as you sit, as you lie down, as you rise up — the truth of God is to be spoken, modeled, and repeated.

Consider Jochebed, the mother of Moses. She lived under Pharaoh's terrible decree that all Hebrew baby boys must be thrown into the Nile. But she feared God more than she feared Pharaoh. She hid her baby for three months. Then, when she could no longer hide him, she made a small basket of reeds, covered it with tar, placed her son inside, and set him among the reeds of the river. Her daughter Miriam watched nearby. When Pharaoh's daughter found the baby, Miriam stepped forward and offered to find a Hebrew woman to nurse him. In God's providence, Jochebed was hired to nurse her own son. For the first years of his life — perhaps three or four years, which in that time was how long children nursed — Moses grew up in his mother's arms, hearing of the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. She had only a few short years to pour into him before he was handed over to Pharaoh's palace. But those years were enough. The identity of Moses was set.

He knew who he was. He knew whose he was. And many decades later, he chose to suffer with the people of God rather than enjoy the pleasures of sin for a season. Mothers, never underestimate the value of those early years. Whatever you plant in the first five years of a child's life will bear fruit for a lifetime.

Consider Hannah again. When she received her son Samuel, she did not cling to him. She weaned him, and then brought him to the tabernacle and gave him to serve the Lord all the days of his life.

Each year she would come and bring him a little coat she had made. Imagine that. Every year she sewed a coat and delivered it to her son, who was serving in the house of God. Samuel grew up in the presence of the Lord. His mother had dedicated him before he was born, and she continued to invest in him even after he left her home. Dedicate your children to God, sister. Not just at a baby dedication ceremony, but every day. Lay them on the altar of the Lord in prayer. Trust God to use them for His glory.

Consider Eunice and Lois, the mother and grandmother of Timothy. Paul writes that the unfeigned faith that was in Timothy dwelt first in his grandmother Lois and in his mother Eunice. Three generations of faith in one family. And yet Timothy's father was a Greek, probably not a believer.

Sometimes a godly mother and grandmother must carry the spiritual weight of the family. They carried it faithfully. And Timothy became a pastor and a close companion of Paul. My sister, whether or not your husband is a strong spiritual leader, you can be a Eunice and a Lois. You can raise children who know the scriptures from their earliest days.

Now let me speak practically. How do you raise godly children in the East Africa of today, when so many influences pull against you — poverty, peer pressure, immoral entertainment, schools that do not teach Christian values, even unbelieving relatives?

First, establish family worship. Every day, if possible. Gather the family, even if only for ten or fifteen minutes. Read a short passage of scripture. Explain it in simple words. Pray. Sing a song of praise. If your children are young, keep it short. As they grow older, make it richer. Do not skip this even when you are tired. Even when the house is busy. The consistency of family worship will shape your children more than any sermon they hear on Sunday.

Second, teach them to pray. Teach them simple prayers at first. Thank God for the food. Thank God for the day. Pray for Baba when he is away at work. Pray for the sick auntie.

As they grow, teach them to pray. Teach them to pray for themselves, their friends, their teachers, their nation. A child who learns to pray young will be a praying adult.

Third, teach them to obey. The Bible commands children to honor and obey their parents. This is the first commandment with a promise. A child who does not learn to obey a parent will struggle later to obey a boss, a pastor, or the Lord Himself. Do not be afraid to discipline. The book of Proverbs says that he who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him disciplines him promptly. Discipline, however, must never be done in anger or in cruelty. It must be done in love, with explanation, followed by forgiveness and affection. Your children should never doubt that you love them, even when you must correct them.

Fourth, teach them the difference between right and wrong in everyday life. Teach them to be truthful. Teach them to work hard at their studies. Teach them to be kind to their siblings. Teach them to be helpful around the home — boys as well as girls should be taught to fetch water, to sweep, to help with cooking. Teach them to respect their elders. Teach them to be modest in their dress and speech. Teach them to keep away from bad company, for evil companions corrupt good character.

Fifth, tell them stories. African mothers have always been great storytellers. Tell them the stories of the Bible — Noah and the flood, David and Goliath, Daniel and the lions, the good Samaritan, the prodigal son. Tell them the stories of the Uganda Martyrs, of young Kizito and Mbaga and Gyaviira, who died rather than deny their faith. Tell them of Mary Slessor, the small Scottish woman who went to West Africa and saved the lives of twin babies who had been left to die. Tell them of Simeon Nsibambi, who prayed for revival in Uganda. Stories put truth into the heart in a way that lectures never can.

Sixth, be present. Children do not care for expensive gifts nearly as much as they care for your time, your attention, your affection. Sit with them. Listen to them. Learn their names, their friends, their fears, their dreams. Know what is happening in their school, in their heart, in their life.

Children who feel known and loved at home are far less likely to run to the world looking for love elsewhere.

Seventh, model what you teach. Children learn more from what you do than from what you say.

If you tell them not to lie but they hear you lie to the neighbor, they will learn to lie. If you tell them to forgive but they see you holding grudges, they will hold grudges. If you tell them to pray but they never see you pray, they will not pray. But if you live what you teach, it will be written on their hearts.

Do not be discouraged if your children do not immediately show the fruit of your teaching. Some children receive the faith quickly. Others go through a wandering season before they return.

Remember Augustine and Monica. Thirty years of tears and prayer preceded his conversion. Keep sowing. Keep praying. The God who began a good work in your family will be faithful to complete it.

One more thing. Some of you reading this may not have biological children. Perhaps God has not given you children yet. Perhaps He has chosen another path for your life. Do not feel that this chapter does not apply to you. God may give you nieces and nephews to pour into. He may give you spiritual daughters in the faith. He may give you a ministry to orphans — and God knows East Africa has many orphans who need Christian aunties. The maternal heart God has placed in you can nurture many children, whether they came from your own body or not.

A Prayer Father, I bring to You the children in my life. I thank You for them. Help me to see them as You see them — as eternal souls whom You have entrusted to my care. Give me the strength to teach them Your ways with diligence. Give me wisdom when I must correct them. Give me patience when I am weary. Cover them with Your mercy when I fail. Save them, Lord.

Call them into Your kingdom. Use them for Your purposes. Let my home be a place where You are known and loved, and where the next generation learns to walk with You. In the name of Jesus, Amen.