Twenty Years Alone

“But thou, when thou prayest, enter into thy closet, and when thou hast shut thy door, pray to thy Father which is in secret; and thy Father which seeth in secret shall reward thee openly.” — Matthew 6:6 (KJV)

Antony found an old abandoned fort across the River Nile and walled himself in. Friends lowered bread to him twice a year. He stayed there, alone with God, for nearly twenty years.

Eventually, so many people wanted to learn from him that his friends broke down the door. Athanasius describes what they saw when Antony came out:

“He had the same habit of body as before, and was neither fat, like a man without exercise, nor lean from fasting and striving with the demons, but he was just the same as they had known him before his retirement.”

And not only his body. Athanasius says his soul was balanced too. He wasn’t gloomy or giddy. He wasn’t thrown by the crowds, or puffed up by all the people greeting him. He was calm, steady and at peace.

Then he began to help people. Athanasius says God healed many through him. He comforted people who were sad, and helped people who had fallen out to make peace. He encouraged everyone “to prefer the love of Christ before all that is in the world.”

A word of caution here. Antony fasted a great deal, often went without sleep, and lived in ways that would be harmful for most people. Athanasius admired this, but it was a special calling in a very different time. God does not ask you to starve yourself, go without sleep, or cut yourself off from family and friends. If you find yourself restricting food or punishing your body, please talk to a trusted adult or a doctor.

What we can learn from Antony’s twenty years is the value of time alone with God. Jesus told us to go into our room, shut the door and pray to our Father in secret. Most of us live surrounded by noise, notifications and other people’s opinions. Even ten minutes alone with God each day can make you steadier, calmer and more ready to help others.

And notice that Antony didn’t stay hidden for ever. His time alone with God prepared him to serve people. Prayer and service go together.

One thing to do this week: find a “closet” this week: a quiet place and time where you can be alone with God for at least ten minutes, without your phone. Use it every day, and notice whether it makes you steadier.