Day 5 — When Parents Say No

“Listen, my son, to your father’s instruction, and do not forsake the teaching of your mother. For they are a garland of grace on your head and a pendant around your neck.”

— Proverbs 1:8–9 (BSB)

“Can I go to the sleepover?” “No.” “Can I get that game?” “No.” “Can I stay up later?” “No.” “Can I have a phone?” “Not yet.”

Sometimes it feels like parents say no to everything. And it’s frustrating! You might think they just don’t understand, or they don’t want you to have fun, or they’re being unfair.

King Solomon wrote the book of Proverbs, and he started it with advice for young people: “Listen, my son, to your father’s instruction, and do not forsake the teaching of your mother.” (This is for daughters too!) To forsake means to throw away or ignore.

Why should you listen? Solomon says your parents’ teaching is “a garland of grace on your head and a pendant around your neck.” A garland was a beautiful crown of flowers, and a pendant was a necklace. In other words, your parents’ wisdom makes your life beautiful. It’s like jewelry you wear.

Here’s something to remember: parents can often see things you can’t see yet. They’ve lived longer. They know about dangers you might not know about. They can see where a choice might lead. When they say no, it’s usually because they love you and want to protect you.

Think about a lifeguard at a swimming pool. When the lifeguard blows the whistle and says, “No running!” it might feel annoying. But the lifeguard isn’t trying to ruin your fun. They’ve seen kids slip and get hurt.

Does that mean you can never disagree? No. You can respectfully ask, “Can you help me understand why?” You can calmly share how you feel. But in the end, God asks you to trust and obey the people He’s put in charge of you. (And remember: if any grown-up ever asks you to do something wrong or unsafe, you should say no and tell another trusted adult.)

And here’s the good news: when you respond to “no” with a good attitude, parents often learn they can trust you with more “yeses” as you grow!

Think about it: What’s a “no” from your parents that frustrated you? Can you think of a reason they might have said it, out of love?

Try this: The next time your parents say no, try responding with, “Okay,” and a calm attitude, instead of arguing. Later, if you want, you can respectfully ask why.

Dear God, sometimes it’s hard when my parents say no. Help me listen to their instruction and trust that they love me. Give me a good attitude, even when I’m disappointed. Thank You for giving me people who care about me. In Jesus’ name, Amen.