A Gift, Not an Ideal

Behold, how good and how pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity! PSALM 133:1

When the Gestapo closed the Finkenwalde seminary in 1937, the experiment in common life that Bonhoeffer had led there was scattered. In the autumn of 1938, working in Göttingen, he wrote a short book about what they had learned. It was published in 1939 as Life Together, and it is the most practical, and perhaps the most widely loved, of all his writings. It begins not with a programme for Christian community but with gratitude.

A privilege, not a right

Bonhoeffer opened the book by reminding his readers that Christians living together is not to be taken for granted. Jesus himself lived in the midst of his enemies, and at the end all his disciples forsook him. Many Christians, in his own day and ours, live scattered — in prisons, in hostile places, among unbelievers, with no other believer near. For them the mere sight of another Christian face can be a great joy. The prisoner, the sick, the isolated missionary know this well. Those of us who can gather freely every week should not forget what a gift it is.

The LORD shall send the rod of thy strength out of Zion: rule thou in the midst of thine enemies. PSALM 110:2

Bonhoeffer wrote this as a man who knew that the freedom to gather could be taken away at any moment. It had already been taken from his seminary. Within a few years it would be taken from him. Most Christians who have ever lived have known that the fellowship of believers is precious precisely because it is fragile. The ones who forget are usually the ones who have never been without it.

Community through Christ

What makes Christian community Christian? Bonhoeffer answered: that it exists only through Jesus Christ and in him. We belong to one another not because we like one another, or share interests, or have chosen one another, but because Christ has made us his own. He is the mediator between us. I cannot reach my brother directly, as it were, by my own affection or effort; I reach him through Christ, and Christ reaches me through him.

This is why, Bonhoeffer said, the Christian needs other Christians. Left to himself, he is uncertain and easily deceived. His own heart wavers. But God has chosen to speak to him through the word of a brother or sister. When another believer speaks the gospel to me — tells me I am forgiven, reminds me of God’s promise — that word from outside is stronger than all the uncertain voices within. We need one another as bearers of God’s word.

For I long to see you, that I may impart unto you some spiritual gift, to the end ye may be established; That is, that I may be comforted together with you by the mutual faith both of you and me. ROMANS 1:11–12

Even Paul, the apostle, longed to be strengthened by the faith of ordinary believers in Rome. No Christian is so strong that he does not need to hear the gospel from someone else.

The death of the dream

Then comes the part of Life Together that has probably done more good in more congregations than anything else Bonhoeffer wrote. He warned against what might be called the dream of community — the picture of Christian fellowship that many believers carry in their heads before they have experienced the real thing. It is an ideal of warmth, harmony, depth and spiritual intensity. And sooner or later, he said, God shatters it.

The shattering is painful. We discover that our brothers and sisters are not what we imagined. They are dull, or irritating, or weak, or unspiritual. And so, we discover, are we. Bonhoeffer said that this disillusionment is a great mercy. The sooner it comes, the better, because only when the dream is dead can we receive the real community God has given. The real thing is not an ideal to be achieved but a reality to be accepted. It already exists, in Christ, and our task is to enter it with gratitude, not to construct it according to our own design.

Wherefore receive ye one another, as Christ also received us to the glory of God. ROMANS 15:7

He added a warning that many pastors have found almost unbearably accurate. The person who loves his dream of community more than the community itself, he said, will end by destroying it, however sincere he may be. He becomes a critic of his brothers, then an accuser, then an accuser of God. He comes to the fellowship with demands, sets up his own standards, and judges everyone by them. When they fail, he blames them; when the dream fails, he blames God. The community is not built up by such a person but slowly poisoned.

Who art thou that judgest another man’s servant? to his own master he standeth or falleth. ROMANS 14:4

Thankful for small things

The remedy Bonhoeffer offered was gratitude. We should thank God daily for the Christian fellowship we have been given, even when it is small, even when it is disappointing, even when there are no great experiences to speak of. A Christian who complains about his church, especially a pastor who complains about his congregation, should be careful. God did not give him that fellowship so that he might be its judge. He gave it so that he might love it.

I thank my God always on your behalf, for the grace of God which is given you by Jesus Christ. 1 CORINTHIANS 1:4

Paul wrote that to Corinth — the church that had given him more heartache than any other. He began not with complaint but with thanks, because he saw them first as the work of God’s grace.

Two kinds of love

Bonhoeffer drew one more distinction in this chapter, between what he called human love and spiritual love. Human love, in his sense, is the love that wants something from the other — desire, influence, closeness, the satisfaction of being needed. It can be very intense and look very spiritual. But at bottom it serves itself. It seeks to bind others to itself, to win them, to shape them. Spiritual love is different. It comes from Christ and serves the other for Christ’s sake. It respects the other’s freedom. It does not try to control or manipulate. It is content to bring the other to Christ and leave him there.

Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil. 1 CORINTHIANS 13:4–5

Real people, real grace

The whole chapter comes down to this: the fellowship God gives is made of real people, with all their faults, and it is held together by real grace, not by our ideals. We do not find perfect brothers. We find forgiven ones. And in accepting them as God has accepted us, we discover that the community we dreamed of was far smaller than the one God had prepared.

We know that we have passed from death unto life, because we love the brethren. 1 JOHN 3:14

FOR REFLECTION AND ACTION

1. Thank God, specifically and by name, for three members of your church this week — especially one who irritates you.

2. Write down the picture of Christian community you carry in your head. Where has reality disappointed it? Offer both the picture and the disappointment to God.

3. If you have been a critic of your congregation, stop for a month. Speak no complaint about it to anyone but God.

4. Ask someone in your church to speak the gospel to you this week — to remind you of God’s forgiveness. Then do the same for someone else.

5. Examine one relationship where you have influence. Are you binding that person to yourself, or bringing them to Christ?

A PRAYER

Father, You have given me brothers and sisters I would not have chosen, and I have not always thanked You for them. Forgive me.

I have loved my dream of Your church more than Your church. I have judged those You have received. Break my ideal, and give me the real fellowship You have made in Christ.

Teach me to love as You love — not to possess or control, but to serve and to set free.

Thank You for every Christian face You have set before me. Keep me from ever taking that gift for granted. Amen.