Day 14 — Not Yet

“O daughters of Jerusalem, I adjure you: Do not arouse or awaken love until the time is right.”

— Song of Songs 8:4 (BSB)

Have you ever had a crush? That’s when you suddenly start thinking a girl is really cute, or you feel nervous around her, or you hope she notices you.

Crushes are really common as guys grow up. If you’ve had one, that’s normal! And if you haven’t, or you think the whole thing is gross, that’s completely normal too.

There’s a book in the Bible called the Song of Songs. It’s a love poem about a husband and wife. And three times in the book, a young woman gives this advice to her friends: “Do not arouse or awaken love until the time is right.” She’s speaking to young women, but her wisdom is for young men too.

In other words: Don’t rush it. Romantic love is a beautiful gift from God. But it’s meant for the right time, and that’s when you’re much older and ready for it. Trying to wake it up too early can lead to heartbreak, distraction and choices you’ll regret.

So what should you do with crushes now?

• Don’t panic. Having a crush doesn’t mean you have to do anything about it.
• Don’t rush into “dating” or “going out.” At your age, it’s much better just to be friends with girls. There’s plenty of time for romance later.
• Treat girls with respect. Remember Book 1? Treat them like sisters. Don’t tease them, talk about their bodies, or make crude jokes about them.
• Don’t let the guys pressure you. Some guys brag about girlfriends or tease each other about girls. You don’t have to join in.
• Be careful online. Never send pictures or private messages to anyone that you wouldn’t want your parents to see.
• Talk to your mom or dad. Tell them about your crush! It might feel embarrassing, but they want to help, and they’ve been there too.

Someday, if God has marriage in your future, you’ll be glad you waited and let love wake up at the right time. For now, enjoy being a guy. Build good friendships, grow in your faith and trust God with your heart.

Think about it: Why do you think the Bible says not to awaken love too early?

Try this: Talk with your mom or dad about crushes and dating. Ask them what they think the “right time” is, and why.

Dear God, thank You that love is a good gift from You. Help me not to rush it, but to wait for the right time. Help me treat girls with respect, and keep my heart focused on You. Help me be honest with my parents about my feelings. In Jesus’ name, Amen.